I don't really know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it when I saw the purple monkey in your closet and I saw you sit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're shamed enough to understand that I'm allergic to your earlobes. I'm returning your nose hair clippers to you, but I'll keep your credit cards as a memory. You should also know that I turned in my confession today about the moose poaching and I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo.

Go drown yourself,
Prostiboots

Dear Prostiboots,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it when your dog humped my leg as you were eating Kraft dinner and I saw you carve your initials into The Catholic Priest. I'm sure you're cowardly enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I hate your cooking and you should stop picking your nose.

Go milk a cow,
Sasami

Don't you hate it when you're out of the loop?

Zenith wrote:Don't you hate it when you're out of the loop?

Dear Zenith,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but the mafia wants you. I think I realized it when I tripped on peanut butter at the mental hospital and I saw you carve your initials into the catholic priest. I'm sure you're open enough to understand we're related. I'm returning your nose hair clippers to you, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I always wanted to break your legs and Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird.

Best of luck on the sex change,
Sagehawk

Nonono, you're doing it all wrong!


There's a system.

Prostiboots wrote:Nonono, you're doing it all wrong!


There's a system.

LOL